Projecting

July 9, 2014

How do I teach my girls to be care-free, try new things and not to be scared of new situations when I can't always lead by example?  The older my girls get the more I find myself facing this conundrum.

For example, this past weekend we went to a little back-bay beach and when we first got there I was excited that the girls could actually play in the water because there were no waves like at the beach.  But then I stood down on the sand at the water and was instantly bitten by all the little sand-crabs in the water; then Emerson got bit/stung by something on her leg, the water was murky, others kids were catching big crabs and talking about seeing fish out in the deeper waters and then that was it . . . I wasn't going in.  But the girls were creeping out further and further and were loving it because they could "swim in the ocean."

I don't like swimming in the ocean or lakes, I don't like roller-coasters, I have a weird freak-out thing with wet hair on me in a shower (yes, my own hair) . . . . so the question is how do I NOT pass this onto my daughters? 

I want them to ride roller-coasters, to learn how to paddle-board and kayak, to swim in oceans and lakes but when they say "hey go on this ride with me mum" or "swim out here mum" in this murky pond with little sand-crabs biting at my legs, how am I going to show them to be confident enough to do it as I say "Hell no!" on the sidelines?  

I am okay with being scared of roller-coasters and not swimming in the ocean and lakes; I don't want to "conquer my fears" now,  that is not my goal here.  My goal is to raise children who have their own fears and quirks from their own experiences, not inherit mine.  

I want them to take their own leaps and jumps but give them the exposure to do so.  I just fear that they will see me afraid or not liking something and just adhere to my same attitude.

Thoughts?


1 comment:

  1. I can totally relate. While I don't have too many fears I am terrified of "letting go". I want my son to be able to play on the street with his friends all summer long like I did growing up, but I am scared of everything happening to him, run over by a car, kidnapped etc.... my husband thinks I am crazy and being irrational but I can't help myself. So I guess my thought is just go slow....I'm letting him go for half an hour at a time and then come check in with me, maybe you could just slowly let them discover these experiences and see what happens.

    Pia
    pjmscloset.blogspot.ca

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